Archive for July, 2009

Daddy Daycare

Most days I can leave the house for work with no problems. Yesterday was one of those rare days when Thing 1 clamped onto my leg and refused to let me leave the house. Hot Momma had to pry Thing 1 off my leg and she was crying her eyes out as a headed out the door. I went home at lunch and once again, Thing 1 would not let me leave. What to do? I did not have any court appearances or client meetings on my schedule, so I took her with me.

Both Thing 1 and Thing 2 love to come to my office. They are excited to see all of the secretaries and attorneys and they know where all of the candy is located. I am fortunate to have a work environment that allows for me to bring my kids from time to time. I have a television in my office and coloring books too.

I probably did not get as much work accomplished yesterday as I should have, but I really enjoyed getting to spend some time with my daughter. I think it was good for her too, this morning I gave her a kiss and a hug and left the house without objection.

Are lawyers ruining all the fun?

Before law school I was able to have fun and enjoy life. After graduating and passing the bar I was a changed person. Fun was replaced by an accute awareness of risk and potential harm. So, being the risk averse person that I have become, the first thing I did to this site after getting it set up was to prepare a disclaimer. I am not your lawyer, I am not your doctor, don’t listen to the things I say, don’t do the things I do, etc. What is the purpose of a disclaimer? It is to try to protect yourself from lawyers.

One summer during my undergraduate days I went to Wal-Mart with my roomates to buy some cheap blinds for our house. The blinds came in a sleeve just big enough to hold the blinds when they were fully compressed. There was a picture on the box showing a window with blinds hanging in the window and in front of the window there was a small side table and an armchair. Below the picture were the words: FURNITURE NOT INCLUDED. This was before my law career, so I stood there looking at the picture and wondered who in the hell would be dumb enough to think that furniture was included in the box. The blinds cost $3.99. Were there people who actually believed that they would find a certificate included in the box entitling them to take delivery of the table and chair? Now my question is whether the disclaimer came after a lawsuit over the failure to include the furniture certificate or was suggested by an attorney to prevent such a lawsuit or was inserted by a manager who thought it should be included because everything else has disclaimers.

Recently I saw a commercial for Dannon yogurt that shows a woman slurping down a yogurt container in the grocery store and at the bottom of the screen it says “Please pay for all items.” This can go two ways. It is a fun, tongue-in-cheek disclaimer, or is it a serious reminder that shoplifting is bad?

It is sad that we have become such a litigious society that we require a disclaimer for everything. Gone are the days when a car commercial did not have to have a professional driver on a closed course, we could enjoy a beer commercial without being told to drink responsibly and it was okay for a commercial to have a dramatization without being identified as a dramatization with the additional caution to not attempt the act depicted.

Why Fat Daddy, Esq?

I’m an attorney, I’m a dad, and, as my four year old often reminds me, I’m fat. I have been married to my beautiful wife (hereinafter “Hot Momma”) for eight years and I am the proud father of two little girls, ages four and two (hereinafter “Thing 1” and “Thing 2” respectively). I have been a licensed attorney for about five years and I have been fat all of my life. It appears that my greatest area of expertise, having a big butt, is also my greatest area for improvement. Thankfully I am a much better husband, father, and lawyer than exercise guru but I am not satisfied in any of these areas. I believe that no matter your situation in life there is always room for improvement.

This site is a resource for a wide array of information on parenting, fitness, finances, lawyering and life improvement. This blog is an entertaining yet informative resource to help you in your pursuit of improvement and a place for Fat Daddy to learn from you through your comments and emails.